So, one of the things that Kelley truly loved was keeping the scorebook for our high school baseball team. As a way to spend more time together, I became the stadium announcer for home baseball games. With Kelley being ill, I took off the spring season, and it ended up being a good thing, because, well, Kelley passed and that press box held a lot of memories of hours spent together and Kelley happily enjoying her work.
Tonight, I was asked to sub in the press box for our summer league team, and found that the press box was indeed haunted. I don’t usually get nervous behind the mic. I’ve announced hundreds of football games to thousands of people over the last 17 years and probably 100 or so baseball games. The memories got to me. It was like announcing my first game, and it wasn’t just being out of practice, it was all the emotion surrounding a simple summer baseball game. It’s these little things that trigger me, not the big stuff.
I’ve seen this in many things since Kelley’s passing. I have to admit that I converted to Catholicism, and pretty much immediately became instantly lapsed. When Kelley died, I sought some solace in religion, and I’ve been to church pretty much every Sunday since.
The thing is, I don’t know that I’m getting solace from the actual religion so much as the being with people and listening to pretty music and inspirational words. I’m not sure how or if that will change, to where I am getting comfort from God et al vs getting comfort from the trappings.
There’s no caboose on this little thought train, just an open ended question.